The Guide to Niggas
by BlueDolphin2011
Summary: Niggas are as complex creatures as they are ignorant. If you think you know a thing or two about niggas, you were wrong. Warning: Offensive to niggas. Written by Huey Freeman. Dictated, not read. The Editor.
1. Disclaimer

The Guide to Niggas

_Dedicated to my brother, Riley. Stay strong._

Forethought:

Hello, my name is Huey Freeman. According to the fact that you just read that, you've just purchased the Guide to Niggas and apparently, you're interested. Warning though, this book contains many themes that may be offensive to the weak of heart or the stupid of the brain. Also you might find out yourself to be a nigga. Do not be alarmed, every nigga has a chance to not be a nigga. That's just about the only thing a nigga deserves.

You may have also heard about nigga moment. This is a temporary state of niggadom. Once again, don't be alarmed, you can reduce your amount of nigga moments by knowledge and education.

This book also contains how to deal with a nigga and how to get rid of a nigga.

You will be satisfied


	2. The Word

Origins

There are many meanings of the word nigga to show the difference in the meanings I'll spell them differently.

Nigger

The word nigga comes from the word 'nigger', which was used to describe an African American slave.

Let's get one thing straight, the word 'nigger' does not exist. People who still use this word are racists or black people with dry humor. Prime example:

A black man sees another one of his black friends kissing a white man's ass. He says, "Shit man. You ain't nothin' but a field nigger!"

That was for humor. But if a man white man says to a black busboy," You stupid nigger! Hurry up with my drinks." Or," Niggers ain't shit." That is a racist in the making.

Truthfully, niggers were smarter than most black people today, which brings me to my next point.

2. Black people

Black people are anyone from African descent. They are usually found in large cities in America or Africa.

In America, the blacks have found their own niche in society. Unfortunately, that niche is usually confused and misguided. Jail, pregnatcy, music, superstition, violence, poverty, religion, athletic, drugs, and laziness are often associated with black people. But in reality, most of these are qualities that are found in niggas. In truth, statistics do show that black males and females are more likely to violent behavior and weapon carrying (most of it provoked though). However we are most likely to use drugs and are notthe majority when it comes to being poor. On television, black people are depicted to be 50% of the poverty population; but in truth only 21.4% are in poverty, nearly half the size depicted. Also, black people are the race that is considered to be in jail:

A mug shot of a black defendant is four times more likely to appear in a local television news report than of a white defendant.

The black accused is twice as likely to be shown physically restrained in a local television news report than when the accused is white.

The name of the accused is two times more likely to be shown on screen in a local TV news report if the defendant is black, rather than white

The chance of a black person not ending up a nigga is getting smaller and smaller each year. But, there are things to stop this evolution of niggas and keeping our brothers and sisters black.

Reading, education, and execution of BET can stop a nigga in his tracks. A nigga cannot exist without chaos.

3. Nigas

A niga is a friend or a person you hang out with. This word is extremely widespread word that is often considered not offensive even though it bears so much resemblance to 'nigger'. That much stirs up so much trouble in civilization due to white people not knowing how hurtful the word can be when not knowing the meaning behind it. Take the case of that black boy who got called a 'niga' by his teacher. The public got made because of his racial slur. In reality he was just a bumbling, old fool who wanted to connect with his students.

4. Wiggers or Wiggas

This is a very popular word in African American culture. It combines the words white and either nigga or nigger. It's usually used to not accept a person whose been raise in a different racial enviornemt than their own or just somebody trying to be something they're not. For instance, a black man who grows up around white people who tries to get along with black people can be called a wigga. Also, a white man who tries to act black (_see: Malibu's Most Wanted_) or just has nigga tendencies (_see: Ed Wuncler III and Gin Rummy_) is also called a wigga.

5. A Nigga

A nigga is the main subject we're focusing on. A nigga is the corrupted version of what would've been a sensible person. There are many different types of niggas, but there are 10 things that describe a nigga:

1. A nigga exploits his own ignorant

2. A nigga will lie

3. A nigga doesn't read

4. A nigga makes excuses

5. A nigga uses words he doesn't really understand

6. A nigga can be of any race, sex or age

7. A nigga discriminates, procrastinates, complains annihilates

8. A nigga doesn't follow rules

9. A nigga will do things first and think later (or never)

10. Most important and essential: A nigga causes chaos

A nigga will always do #10 but does either 2 or more of the of the other categories.

Next chapter: Different Types of Niggas: In Depth


	3. What is a nigga?

Different Types of Niggas: In Depth

Mr. Deonte Lee Johnson III, age 23. He's black, he's grown and worst of all, he's a nigga. Deonte is a prime example of a person that is a nigga in every way possible.

First of all, Deonte is proud of being a nigga. He treats his niggahood as if it's a precious commodity that somehow keeps him alive. What he doesn't know (surprise, surprise) is that the very thing he holds near and dear to him may kill him in a long run. Take for example the incident on March 9, 2006. Deonte was in his 12th grade year. This was infact Deonte's very last year of education. On that fateful day, Deonte cursed out his teacher, fought 3 students and walked off campus. In addition this ridiculous display of niggadom, he refused to do any more work in his life becase

_"I ain't that smart my nigga!"_

Ask yourself, why would a perfectly logical black man exploit his own ignorance for no apparent reason? Let's see a few reasons why:

A. The White Man

B. The White Man

C. He is a nigga/ experiencing a nigga moment

If you picked A or B, that's impressive but not the reason in this case. The answer is C, Deonte is a nigga. More specifically, he is a nigga who

1. Exploits his own ignorance

Now, when Deonte got home, his mother asked him why exactly he did what he did. Deonte, being the nigga that he his, told her that he got held at gun point and was suffering from stress. This is a flat out lie. Believing her nigga, his mother ties to enroll him in another school so that he could get make something other than a nigga out of himself. He replied with

_"Mannnnnnnnnnnn, fuck these books! I don't know that shit! Keeping it real!"_

Niggas love to keep it real. Real dumb.

Showing that he fits into the two next types of niggas

2. Lying

3. No reading

Especially for no apparent reason, lying and not reading are probably the least dangerous types of niggas on the list. Despite this, don't let it fool you. Every type of nigga has the hazard of creating more niggas and harming non-niggas, whether it's physical, mental, spiritual, socially, ethically, musically or anything else.

Obviously Deonte is making excuses for why he won't do something that benefits him and once again he fits into another nigga category

4. Making excuses

Truth be told, a nigga usually isn't well-rounded in different types of niggas like Donte. But, that doesn't mean that a nigga is limited either.

Let's direct our attention to Mr. Edward Leonard Wuncler III. He is the heir of a multi-million dollar from his grandfather, who founded a series of banks, hotels, stores and a new type of greed that only an old white man can discover. Ed has an opportunity to be anything and everything he can be in this world. Rich, famous, educated and wanted. The only problem with Ed is that he takes 'wanted' as a literal term for running from the law. Ed is a wannabe criminal, drunken psychopath who wants to separate himself as far as possible from the 'wealth' image. To make matters worse, listen to Ed's take on his fortune and future

_"Man, fuck it. This shit is 'catastrophlic'! How the fuck is a nigga gone be getting bitches if they think he's some stuck up 'pussyfied' bitch?"_

Beautiful. Now, why exactly did Ed feel the need to use these nonexistent words?

A. He's an idiot

B. He doesn't know most words

C. He's a nigga

If you answered any of the 3 above, you are correct. But, considering the title of the book and the subject of our discussion, it's C. he's a nigga. A nigga that fits our next category

5. Using words/ Making up words he doesn't understand

Now, in contrast to our previous subject, Ed is white. Shocking, I know. But, as said before, a nigga can

6. Be of any race

George Wallace. A public figure who most people over 40 know about. And, if you read, under 30. Quick pop quiz about what George Wallace is _not_

A. A democrat

B. Evil

C. A nigga

D. Alive

Can't make a decision? It's D. Wallace died in 1998 for anyone who has no clue who he is. If you do know who he is and still can't make a decision, maybe you _need_ this book. George Wallace was an open racist who discriminated against minorities when he ran for president 3 times in the 1960s and 1970s. In addition to his constant complaining about blacks, he was a strong advocator for segregation. In 1972, Arthur Bremer attempted to assassinate the crazy evil white man. Many people have claimed that Bremer took too long to attempt to assassinate him, making him a nigga as well. This shows that a nigga will

7. Discriminate, procrastinate, complains and annihilates

A few years ago, my brother ran across a friend names Lamilton Taeshawn. Lamilton was a violent, brash, sociopath nigga. Although he was only 10 at the time, this nigga had found a way to be entered into the 'system'. And by the 'system', I mean prison. Anal rape and all. He would constantly smoke with cigarettes, steal cars, killling his grandfather and beating up his grandmother. By age 10, he had been sent to prison for not recognizing the concequences of his actions. He fits our last two categories of being a nigga.

8. Doesn't follow rules

9. Do first, think later

Deonte, Ed, Wallace, Bremer and Lamilton are all drastically different people, but they all have two things in common.

** 10. They wreak havoc and chaos on society and are niggas. **

Next Chapter: How to spot, avoid and avoid becoming a nigga


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